Thirty stars flew by my eyes in brilliant spectacle on a night this past August, when the Perseid meteor shower was in sight from my desert vantage point. To stand on the planet and watch the heavens send light across the sky, takes my breath away, every time.
But this blog-post is not about those stars. It is about the other stars, the ones in Hollywood who dazzle us in movies and on TV. I remember my first movie vividly, like an alcoholic remembers her first drink. I was three years old and I’ve been star struck ever since.
I frequently listen to interviews with stars because there is more to learn from them than how the majority of Hollywood marriages fail. Often these stars have made their ascent to stardom in a way that can shine light on a how I can be more aligned with my own journey.
Three stars whose stories currently blaze before me in this way are John Travolta, Kristin Wiig, and Jerry Seinfeld. In the interest of bite-size pieces and precarious attention spans, I’ll start with Mr. Travolta and post the other two in the upcoming blogs.
As we know, John Travolta ascended from Welcome Back Mr. Kotter to Saturday Night Live and then to Pulp Fiction and beyond. But did he always believe he could?
As a matter of fact, yes.
During an interview on Inside the Artist’s Studio, he shared what it was like to grow up in his family. Everyday was like a show for his parents; they indulged him with praise for his performances to the point where once when he took out the garbage, he overheard his mom saying to his dad, “Look at him. Isn’t he a borderline genius?” The confidence he gained from this adoration served him his entire career beginning when ironically, at an audition a committee urged Travolta to get out of the business. They felt he wasn’t talented enough, an opinion that has led many others to abandon this avenue completely.
His response?
“I thought they were absolutely nuts.
I didn’t go away caved in.
I thought, ‘What a silly group of people they were.’”
I didn’t have parents who indulged me. They were wonderful in many ways, but in Midwestern form, they were embarrassed by my desire to go public with my speaking and writing. Consequently, my confidence used to waver when habit pulled me toward the shadows; I sometimes kaboshed projects by inhibiting myself because I assumed others would be embarrassed by me too. It’s not uncommon to feel this way – many of the clients I work with struggle with the same thing; it’s a response born of fear not trust. Trust is a necessary ingredient of success in the creative arena.
John Travolta’s trust in himself and simple response to the people who tried to discourage him, gave me the idea to see my path with new possibility. And although he had a childhood of unconditional praise that instilled iron-clad self-belief and I didn’t, I believe the human spirit is designed to rise above the darkness especially when inspired by others who have done so.
The confidence that Travolta has is possible for all of us when we have the intention, willingness and patience to indoctrinate a more light-filled belief, knowing we can choose from what others before us have proven possible. Did I mention PATIENCE? Oh, yeah, and we need patience.
Having unrealistic expectations about the time and series of imperfect approximations it takes to change to a more empowered path is where many people fall. We won’t be the same as others, but with small wobbly steps we can rev up our belief in ourselves in a way that takes us to higher plateaus of existence, creativity, and joy.
Believe me, it’s been liberating to soar past the limitations that once kept me from experiencing the blast of what else is out there.
We have more choices than we think if we start where we are and don’t expect instant change.
If Travolta’s "What-silly-people" stardust isn’t something you need, maybe there is another star out there that has something for you. Or stay tuned to the next blogs -- I’ll sprinkle more stardust your way.
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