Got Perfectionistic Tendencies? Overwhelmed? Accessorized with Self-Loathing?

 

We can really LOSE perspective when we try to be perfect all the time because IT'S JUST NOT POSSIBLE.  

Do any of these sound familiar?

• I try something new and because it doesn’t work immediately I give up.
• I’m overwhelmed by all the expectations I have for myself and which others have for me.
• I’m not able to enjoy things I used to enjoy or relax like I used to.
• I can’t decide where to focus my attention.. or I just can’t focus period.
• I do not journal or engage in any creative ritual or pursuit anymore because I stopped doing it everyday like I told myself I would.
• I compare myself to others thinking I should be where they are (even if it took them years to get there).
• I say things like "Oh, I'm not creative..."
• I value myself based on the quality and/or quantity of my accomplishments not on simply who I am.
• I’m not starting or continuing a creative passion or business step because I perceive myself as not ready: not enough instruction, expertise, space, materials, equipment, confidence.
•  I beat myself up for something that I know deep inside I’m doing good enough (or maybe I don’t know that yet… but I do beat myself up a lot because of my high standards).
• When I discover solutions that initially work, I give up on them quickly because they do not work immediately or the way I was expecting including changes in thought, feeling and action.
• I can’t forgive myself perfectly or let go of regret for something I did in the past  – or I avoid this whole topic by medicating, getting addicted to computer games and social networks.
• I hate myself for spending so much time doing things unrelated to my creative call.
• I don’t talk on the phone because it means I’ll have to be a certain way and meet someone's expectations of me.
• When I don’t get the exact results I want from my creative efforts I feel frustrated, not good enough, or a failure.
• I fear I’m wasting time and money on something that won’t go anywhere anyway. 
• I sabotage relationships, work, health programs, weight loss because it’s too hard to do those things perfectly or like "I'm supposed to" all the time.  (This may be subconscious).
• When I hear someone compliment me I think “What are THEY thinking?” or simply ignore them and continue to think I’m not good enough.
• I don’t meditate because I can’t stop my mind from thinking thoughts completely so I must be meditating wrong.
• I don’t clean the house or clear clutter because I never have enough time to do it perfectly.  
• I do not do yoga, workout, or engage in other things that make me feel good because I think I have to attend a class or do it perfectly or for a certain amount of time for it to be credible.
• I don’t show up at social functions because I have high expectations about how I’m suppose to be when I’m there.
• I am medicating a little too much because I’m not feeling perfect all the time… footnote: we’re human we don’t feel perfectly all the time and it’s okay.. the imperfect ways we feel breed poetry, art, music, line-dancing or at the very least, if you're wise.. they breed compassion and compassion is gold.

(C) Jill Badonsky 2010... please only duplicate with credit to www.kaizenmuse.com Thanks

Wellllll...?  How'd you do? If you agreed with some (or a lot) of those statements you're not alone. But people are beginning to discover there IS a way to get through this limited existence to  plug into their talents, higher intentions, and the creative life that awaits them.

If you're ready to be compassionate toward yourself and move on from the behaviors and thoughts that keep you in a small and restricted existence, check out Blissfuly Imperfect: Liberating Creativity Joy. Beam yourself here. Begins January 31, 2011.

Comments

[dldselfnarration]

When you gave these DO YOU's to us on the last teleconference, I was surprised to see so many that I answered yes to, I honestly thought that I wasn't so self-critical. So my wake up was this realization and I haven't called myself stupid once in the last three days. Instead, I laugh and make light of my flightiness and let these things just Flyyyyyy awayyyy! Thanks Jill ;-))

[Mary Kelly Guerin]

Jill,

These areamazingly dead on insights into my pysche,,creative neurosis..crank up the music and let's collectively dance away the roadblocks to creative joy.